The Most Dangerous Game
by WeBuiltThePyramids
Summary: The idea is fooling her dad into thinking they're dating.  The reality is she has to try to fool herself into thinking that a game is all it is.  And what she discovers is terrifying.


**First: Anyone who can easily write in the present tense is my hero. I had to edit this three times because I kept noticing myself slipping into the past tense. If I have any more errors, lo siento mucho!**

**This is Penny's thoughts during The Boyfriend Complexity. Complex, indeed.**

**I don't own anything.**

It's a simple acting job. At least that's what she thinks of it as, at first. Then she puts her arms around his neck and kisses him, closing her eyes and using her hands to hold him in place, just like she used to do. The kiss lasts a bit longer than she had intended, but she tells herself that it was simply her subconscious telling her that it would do better to convince her dad.

In reality, she knows that it wasn't true. What had happened was that the moment their lips touched she started losing herself again. She somehow hadn't expected that, despite the feeling she'd had the week before during Truth or Dare. She supposes that it had crossed her mind at least once, but she'd always figured she'd be able to control it.

Hey, she'd been wrong before.

She decides to go over and explain herself…and to ask him to play along, which seems like the perfect plan to her until she realizes that asking Leonard to play along means that she has to kiss him some more. She doesn't want to do that; she knows what that kiss at the door felt like and that scares her. She is terrified of what she'll do if she lets herself enjoy the kisses, even in play, so she stiffens up, pretends that she doesn't want to kiss him because her father is there, not because they aren't together or because she knows that she can't handle it. She has to let him touch her, put his hands on her sides and his lips on hers, so she just tries to hate it and always ends up pulling back because she knows that hating it is impossible.

She tells Leonard how her father liked him; how he'd asked why she'd dumped him and why she couldn't still be with him, and how he'd said that Leonard had likely never tipped a cow over on himself. She neglects to mention the other things her dad had said, like "I don't think Leonard would ever cheat on you," or, once she'd told him that they were together again, "I'm glad that you've finally met someone who loves you for you." She conveniently leaves out the real story of how they fake got back together.

She begins to realize that this game she's playing with him in not Indian Monopoly. It's much more dangerous than that.

The he says "I love you," and she knows, by his mischievous smirk that he's telling her that _she_ asked him to deceive; he had the power and yes, he was going to go there, "put it out there" in front of her dad; daring him to say it back. So she does, a part of her wishing that the first time she said it she wasn't playing, and then she reminds herself that they aren't really together. Then they kiss again, and as reluctant as she forces herself to be, she felt, without fail when his lips touch hers, that sparkle of energy that shoots through her entire body and proves that her feelings for him are far from gone.

When, the following day, she tires of listening to her father tell her how happy he is that she's back with Leonard, and how wonderful he is, she gets up without thinking and storms across the hall, realizing when she gets there that she's no longer sure of…well…anything. She gets angry when Leonard challenges her reasons for the visit, but she's still warm from being called "lovebug" and still thinking of the idea of Mrs. Leonard Hofstadter and still noticing how attractive his new confidence is…and she's so confused and he is standing there looking at her and for once she is happy to see Sheldon because it means she doesn't have to continue the discussion. Of course, seeing Leonard's smile after Sheldon mentions her overuse of the phrase "oh, my God," just makes everything worse.

So she goes home, and the following day decides to tell her father. She can't pretend anymore; it's too hard and she's never been the greatest actress in the world anyway.

"It's Leonard," her dad says after someone can be heard shouting in the background. "Says he loves you."

He's not lying. And that's why she has to tell her dad the truth. Because this game is not for the unsure. Because she knows she's still unsure. Because she's still scared.

**Hope you liked it!**


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